From Singing Bananas to Vests

I was a bit under the weather today, aches, pains, etc. Had a test at the hospital this morning. I had an MRI, and I never have trouble in those things. But this morning was different. I felt so claustrophobic! I kept thinking of that old Vincent Price movie where someone’s buried alive and tries to claw their way out of a coffin. Not good imagery when you’re stuck in a narrow tube for 30 minutes. Well, I wasn’t stuck. I had a rubber bulb in my hand in case I wanted to scream, LET ME OUT! and they would’ve slid me out. Needless to say, I started conjuring more relaxing spacious images like floating on a smooth pond with the wide open sky above me. It worked.. But next time I’m asking for those newfangled “open” MRI’s. Normally I’m not this wussy but it was an off morning all around.

In essence, I didn’t go to work, which was completely unplanned on my part. I have zero energy. Reaction from my flu shot? Lupus flare? Nerves? I don’t know. I considered calling to see if I could babysit my granddaughter(s) but knew I wasn’t up to that. So I found myself talking to myself and to the pets all morning. I thought I was the only one in the house (little did I know it was also my daughter’s day off).

I was saying things aloud like,

“One life left! Come on, give me a yellow bubble before the virus bubble wipes me out!” and

“Wouldn’t you know it, I am all settled in and the remote is WAY over there…” and

“Darn it, kitty cat, this is an important game. Vamoose!” (I was playing Bubble Witch.)

But Kerry didn’t think anything of it; of me talking in a quiet room. She surprised me when she suddenly walked out of her bedroom though. She said she’d assumed I was talking on the phone. That was a silly deduction. I’m rarely on the phone! I know, I know, I’m supposed to be referring to my daughter as ‘he,’ or ‘him,’ or ‘son,’ or ‘Silas’...For those of you who follow my blog, you’ve probably read MY DOLLMAN and also the follow-up I wrote to that blog, with Jenny Boylan’s comments. Kerry is transgender, or uh wanting to change her/his gender… But it’s hard calling her a ‘he.’

My son, my middle son, who does not live with me, surprised me with a visit today. It was nice seeing him. After he left, I signed into Facebook, and what did I see? A fake status! My son had somehow hijacked my IPhone, and posted a silly status update. It went something like this:

“Watching bananas in pajamas alone dressed in my medieval garb is my definition of a great Thursday.”

All three of my children (who are now adults,) have my sense of humor. My oldest son in particular used to watch the kids’ show Bananas In Pajamas, actually. As a total aside, I noticed recently that he kept a Popples toy from his childhood which he lets his girls play with. My 32 year old son waxing nostalgic! Anyway, back on topic (do I ever really have a topic?) I texted my middle son of course (after I explained to FB pals that the post was not legit in case they didn’t deduce that for themselves). Who knows? Once upon a time I walked around dressed in mime, so the status could very well have been on the up and up! See my book Under The Banana Moon for more on that, but I digress again- and so I texted my mischievous son this:

“Wow, Jeremy, you’re good! I never even saw you swipe my phone and post that fake status. But….your imagination is a little scary!”                                    I was trying to be witty.

                This is what he texted back:

“It’s because you’re a kid at heart but you’re a tough cookie and you stay strong, almost like wearing a metaphoric suit of armor.”

Well, that’s an interesting ‘take’ on me. I like it. I immediately texted him back that I would use that in my blog. So here I am, doing just that. I went a step further. In fact, I made up this little picture with my Corel program and posted to my FB friends that I was indeed watching Bananas In Pajamas while wearing Medieval garb:


It’s not very good. Still getting the hang of my Corel. While on the topic of SILLY, did you know that Q-Tips were once called Baby Gays? I kid you not.


Also on the topic of SILLY, my “tacky Christmas vest” came by Federal Express today. What a nice surprise! I love to receive packages, especially when I get good deals and buy things for good prices. I located the vest which I ended up buying by googling keywords: “Tacky Christmas Vest.” My (late) mother and I used to wear matching ones every year. This is the actual vest right here that came in the mail today: Aren’t I going to look smashing?


Well, I’ll leave you with the following image and then off to do writer stuff, editing and whatnot. Bye for now!


above: Images Filled with Childhood Fantasy and Dreams by France-based creative Alastair Magnaldo

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